mialoveshenrymiller – Letter 45 – A Dreamy Dinner with a Handsome Detective, and a Gun in My Lingerie Drawer

mialoveshenrymiller

Letter 45 – A Dreamy Dinner with a Handsome Detective, and a Gun in My Lingerie Drawer

“And what is the hero? Primarily one who has conquered his fears.  One can be a hero in any realm; we never fail to recognize him when he appears.  His singular virtue is that he has become one with life, one with himself. Having ceased to doubt and question, he quickens the flow and rhythm of life.  The coward, per contra, seeks to arrest life’s flow.  He arrests nothing, to be sure, unless it be himself. Life moves on, whether we act as cowards or as heroes. Life has no other discipline to impose, if we would but realize it, than to accept life unquestioningly.  Everything we shut our eyes to, everything we run away from, everything we deny, denigrate or despise, serves to defeat us in the end.  What seems nasty, painful, evil can become a source of beauty, joy and strength, if faced with an open mind. Every moment is golden one for him who has the vision to recognize it as such.” –Henry Miller, The World of Sex

I’m writing this letter on April 5, 2012 at 2:43 p.m.

Dear Henry,

I’ve been painting since 5 a.m. this morning.  For many weeks, every minute of my day seems to be consumed by painting and creating new art work. The isolation is starting to get to me.  I normally don’t mind my solitude.  But, after many weeks of it, I am itchy for the companionship of others. I wanted to write a few paragraphs to you, before I have to clean up, pack up my things at my loft, go home to the suburbs, and get ready for another burlesque show.  I have a few hours before Mr. C will be picking me up from my loft to bring me home.  On Friday night, I will finally be surrounded by other human beings for a few hours!  I am hoping that we will bring in a large crowd, even though it’s “Good Friday” and Easter weekend.  I’m going to need to return to my loft right after the show and start painting again.  I’m behind schedule.  The tiny details in this portrait are time consuming and require slow precision.  I’m also running out of paint, and can’t work on the portrait until I find time to purchase some more.  I anticipate a trip to the art store this evening, on my way home. Continue reading

mialoveshenrymiller – Letter 44 – A Bitch in Heat, Kinky Collars, and an Erotic Dinner on All Fours

mialoveshenrymiller

Letter 44 – A Bitch in Heat, Kinky Collars, and An Erotic Dinner On All Fours

I’m writing this letter at 3/27/2012 at 11:53 p.m.

Dear Henry,

“Among painters as among writers there are those who stick to their guns, who follow the scent like bloodhounds, as it were, as there are others who sit like birds of prey on some imaginary limb or ledge, ready to pound on the happy accident which will lead them to some unknown, undreamed of destination.” –Henry Miller, Henry Miller, The Paintings of Henry Miller; Paint As You Like and Die Happy

I have been painting very long hours, which has consumed most of my last few days and nights.  I didn’t get much sleep last night.  I have two days left until I need to deliver my art work to the gallery.  I will be writing you this letter in tiny spurts, as I take a break from painting and rest my feet.  My legs, feet, hands, fingers and wrist hurt from standing so long, painting small details, and polishing each portrait, until each of them are completely finished.

It was this time last year, when I was up all night with my young daughter, helping to deliver my beautiful granddaughter into this world.  She is very precious to me and turned one year old yesterday.  I’m having a family party for her this coming Sunday.  I just ordered the food for the party and the cake this morning.  I did not think that I would enjoy being Nana Mia as much as I have.

“But, I felt my Master’s hands, soft hands, the hands of a gentleman, lifting me. I saw a little bath stall before me where a man waited with a brush and scrub bucket.” –Ann Rice, Beauty’s Punishment

I had a very interesting, sexy, submissive evening with Mr. B last night.  The memories have lingered in my mind most of today.  Lately, I have been reading a lot of books on erotica, especially when I rest, after painting for long hours, indulging in my long, hot baths.  Recently, I’ve been enamored with Molly Weatherfield’s erotic s/m novel, Carrie’s Story.  Her well written erotic story has had me yearning to explore further, plunge deeper and explore vaster into my BDSM, role play experience. Continue reading

mia loves henry miller – Letter 19 – The Nightclub, The Gothic, The Kinky, and the Land of the Misfit Toys

mia loves henry miller

Letter 19 – The Nightclub, The Gothic, The Kinky, and the Land of the Misfits Toys

“I masturbate often, luxuriously, without remorse or after distaste.  For the first time I know what it is to eat.  I have gained four pounds.  I get frantically hungry, and the food I eat gives me lingering pleasure.  I never ate before in this deep carnal way.  I have only three desires now, to eat, to sleep, and to fuck.  The cabarets excite me. I want to hear raucous music, to see faces, to brush against bodies, to drink fiery Benedictine.  Beautiful women and handsome men arouse fierce desires in me.   I want to dance. I want drugs.  I want to know perverse people, to be intimate with them.  I never look at naïve faces.  I want to bite into life, and to be torn by it.  Henry does not give me all this.  I have aroused his love.  Curse his love.  He can fuck me as no one else can, but I want more than that.  I’m going to hell, to hell, to hell.  Wild, wild, wild. ” –Anais Nin, Henry and June Diaries, page 179

Continue reading